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Is he really a fan or did my gun make his thumb put scrill' in my hand?

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A-Wax really stepped up his fan-relations game since the Everybody days, huh?

"Yeah, so you bought my CD
What you wanna see a slug in 3D?
So I'll f**k your bitch
And she pretend you me when she suck your dick"


A-Wax - Everybody
(From Thug Deluxe album; 2004)



Wouldn't say no to a remastered reissue of Thug Deluxe with the Game track removed.

Tweetz is talkin' and they're sayin' 2$hin is a transphobe

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Plz believe Team Martorialist stays holdin' AZNs down like gravity in their times of crisis. Thus, here's an MP3 of that lauren Harries & Pete Burns duet of You Spin Me Round (Like A Record) on Celebrity Big Brother's Little Brother for the Mongolian Mike Parry to open his breakfast radio show with tomorrow morning. Show these haters why you're the Genghis Haaan of hot tracks, lid!



LOL @ 'Murica shamelessly biting the U.K's juiciest news scandals. Bruce-turnt-Caitlyn is just a half-arsed rehash of the Frank "Kellie" Maloney story, minus the UKIP side-narrative and the Ricky Hatton soundbites.

Lil' Chris should have been in the 2015 XXL Freshman list

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Lil' Chris ft. Sasha Go Hard - Ohh Na Na
(From the internet; 2015)


Wherein the Mr. Darcy of polyphony Lil' Chris goes Quiet Storm stadium-rap and Sasha Go Hard returns from the wastelands of Ryan Hemsworth cloud-rap collaborations/Alex MacPherson FACT Magazine reviews where he complains about her getting pregnant. Throw this on repeat with your significant other tonight and you might just have your own little bundle of joy to clog up your friend's Instagram feeds with in 9 months time. "Pussy so good that I wanna sing to youuuuuuuuu..."

True story, my best of Lil' Chris compilation still decimates anything that's been uploaded to Livemixtapes or DatPiff in 2015.

#Problematic

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(No Slim Thug & Pharrell.)

Styles P ft. Max B - Kill That Faggot (remix)
(From Max B's Million Dollar Baby 2 mixtape; 2008)



Hat tip to ANU for reminding me there was a Max B remix of Styles P's Kill That Faggot where Biggavelz spat some of the foulest raps of his career. Bumped into Styles in a hotel last year and suggested to him that Kill That Faggot was the hardest shit since MC Ren. He agreed and lamented how the suits at Koch wouldn't let him include it on his Super Gangster (Extraordinary Gentleman) album because of the song's title/hook. Oh what a difference the letter M coulda made.

Styles P - Kill That Faggot
(From The Ghost In The Shell mixtape; 2007)

"This is reality-rap, we all go through it!" part 100

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"Everything 100, my n*gga
Took my phone off the charger at 100 percentage"


D-Rek ft. C Plus & Nef The Pharaoh - WTF
(From Soundcloud; 2015)



Very much feeling this Hyphy/Ratchet hybrid movement Nef The Pharaoh seems to be spearheading right now. Nef raps about bringing zombies back to life and eating eagles on WTF but that "I got the Furly God, you feel me, cuddy?" line is the key lyric here because this track is pretty much Hustle 2k15 in everything but song title.

Related note: how on Earth did Derek C & Derek D manage to get first dabs on the best DJ Mustard beat since Post To Be? Moreover, how on Earth did they manage to convince Jeremih to fly over to the UK and appear in the video when he refused to shoot a promo for Don't Tell 'Em? Every country gets the Costco value knock-off of Bash Bash's Certified Freak it deserves.

Pat Queen/Garetty Wap

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Much like there are multiple different edits of Sam Peckinpah's Pat Garrett and Billy The Kid, Trap Queen is a song which exists in various incarnations: there's the O.G version uploaded to Soundcloud which is absent of Fetty Wap's rap verse and his mate Nitt Da Gritt's closing monologue; there's the O.G retail version featuring Nitt Da Gritt's monologue but no Fetty verse; there's the video-turnt-2nd-retail version featuring the verse and the monologue; and there's at least 4 different remixes, including the UK mix with Azealia Banks which is probably some sort of punishment on this country for inflicting Sam Smith on the U.S.

Whilst Peckinpah stans still can't agree on which of the current cuts of Pat Garrett and Billy The Kid is the best, you'd have to be a right Joey Deacon not to consider the 2nd incarnation of Trap Queen as the definitive one, even if it was Trap Queen mk 3 which ultimately became the all-conquering global hit - there's no cumbersome attempt at rapping by Fetty to kill your buzz but you still get the pleasure of Nitt Da Gritt on his Don King type shit to end the song on a victorious high:

Fetty Wap - Trap Queen (2nd version)
(From the internet; 2014)


Basically, one love to all the true Trap Queen fans who copped their MP3 of it before mid-december 2014.

Generic list post: a Lev Berlak appreciation

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Until I peeped his AllMusic page last week, all ya boy knew about Lev Berlak was that he was the Oakland producer who'd notched up credits for Dru Down, Mac Dre, and the Mob Figaz, and helmed A-Wax's Thug Deluxe album from top to bottom. Turns out Lev was also responsible for a shitload of deep cuts I'd never realised were his beats and a shitload of great tracks I'd never heard before. What's more, his studio The Grill has been the go-to spot for mixing & mastering in northern California since the late nineties, making him the Mike Dean of Mob Music. Lev Berlak? More like Lev BerSlap amirite:

Dru Down - Choppin' It Up (1996)
Dru Down - Head And Shoulders (1996)
Richie Rich - Real Shit (1996)
Richie Rich ft. Simply E - It's Not About You (1996)
Mind Over Body - Anotha Day (1996)
Mind Over Body - Creepin' Thru Yo' Hood (1996)
X-Mob - Paper Chasing (1997)
3x Krazy ft. Dru Down & Yukmouth - Pistols Blazin' (1997)
Da Productz - It's About The Money (1998)
N2Deep ft. Baby Beesh & Mac Dre - The Throw (1998)
Mac Dre - Rapper Gone Bad (1999)
Mob Figaz - Tailor Made (1999)
Mob Figaz - Hustle In The Rain (1999)
Agerman ft. Richie Rich - All About Dollar$ (1999)
Keak Da Sneak - Alright Cool (1999)
Keak Da Sneak ft. Agerman - No Love (1999)
Mac Dre - So Hard (2001)
Mac Dre - Bleezies-N-Heem (2001)
The Jacka - Tha Mayor (2002)
Husalah - Hustlin' Ass (2002)
PSD Tha Drivah ft. Keak Da Sneak - Streets Or Rap Game (Remix) (2002)
Mac Dre - Witme? (2004)
Mac Dre - Me Damac (2004)
Mac Dre - Hotel, Motel (2004)
A-Wax - Dollar Bill (2004)
A-Wax - This Town (2004)
A-Wax - Check 1,2 (2004)
A-Wax - Be Together (2004)
A-Wax - Before You Go (2004)
J Stalin - Pop My Collar (2005)
P.S.D Tha Drivah ft. J Stalin - Joseph Stalin (2007)
A-Wax - Hum Bum (2009)

Gonna hazard a guess that there's also a handul of Lev Berlak tracks spread out across all those noughties Messy Marv albums with no production credits. Plz tell me he's behind "B" or Cheese You Out?

"Any requests?"

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"Never had no patience, waited for nobody
I feel like the mayor when I'm in the party"


Nebu Kiniza - Myself
(From Soundcloud; 2014)


This snappy little Wizcore ode to doin' it thyself sounds so much better in june 2015 than it did when I first heard it back in december 2014. What a pity fat Rickie from My So Called Life had to besmirch it with a remix a couple of weeks back before I could throw the original here into rotation and annoy everyone at the bar by recreating it inna Fresh Prince stylee. Even your girlfriend gonna act a fool on her glass of Prosecco with a spoon like "yeah, yeah, yeah!" to this one.

R.I.P Ornette Coleman

The Slim 400 blows

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Speakin' of current singles which exist in hella incarnations, there's also Slim 400's On My Set. Originally a Hunyae song which Slim merely guested on, Slim then copped the song for himself, added his Pushaz Inc boss YG on the 2nd verse, and removed Hunyae's verse but kept his hook. Now there's another remix that's basically On My Set 2.0 with a new 3rd verse by Big Quis from Doughboyz Cashout AKA Juverassic 5:

Slim 400 ft. Hunyae, YG & Big Quis - On My Set (remix)
(From YouTube/Foe Block mixtape; 2015)


As a fan of previous Pushaz Inc/Doughboyz Cashout collaborations like Hella Ice, I ain't mad at this new remix becoming the def facto version of On My Set. Shit, Big Quis might even have the best bars in the whole song now with "I am not tryna kick it, I ain't Bruce Lee!"

Martorialist elegance # 79

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You can take the man outta Baduizm, but you can never take the Baduizm outta the man:


Septum-piercings may have set black people back a couple of decades. Swag levels set to ‘gap year in Goa’?

A Lev Berlak productions compilation 4 u

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(Has anybody ever seen Lev Berlak and DJ Yoda in the same room??)

One of the French lads turned my Lev Berlak appreciation generic list post into a zipfile. 32 tracks deep and featuring songs by Dru Down, Richie Rich, Mac Dre, the Mob Figaz, The Jacka, Husalah, A-Wax, 3x Krazy, Keak Da Sneak, PSD Tha Drivah, Agerman, Mind Over Matter, X-Mob, Da Productz, N2Deep, and J Stalin.

Download the compilation here, and peep the original post for an explanation on why Lev Berlak is the Mike Dean to RobLo's N.O Joe.

Cheerio, Chingo & Pancho

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Chingo Bling ft. Willie P Keys & Pancho V - I Ain't Thinkin' Bout U
(From Masahouse 2 mixtape; 2015)


Whatta beat and whatta hook! That rappin' really gets in the way, though, so it's gotta go. I hit up Jack The Snipper DJ Step One again and he edited the song down to its bare essentials of Willie P Keys' hook x 3 for the good of all dance floors across the globe. Think of us as the Crooklyn Clan of functional Function music:

Willie P Keys - I Ain't Thinkin' Bout U (Martorialist Edit)
(From t'internet; 2015)


Don't ever think we ain't got love for Chingo Bling here at the Martorialist, mind; after all, what kinda person could ever dislike the rapper who almost justified Makonnen's whole existence with I Don't Sell Tamales No More?

Get yer copy of I Got That Work out fer the lads!

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HD of Bearfaced prides himself on being one of the capital lock REALEST rappers in the Bay, and so when he bragged that he "got that old Big Tymers up in my deck" on 2014 Martorialist favourite Don't Like Me he knew he'd have to show and prove if he ever shot a promo for the song. Hope dude really does own I Got That Work from back in t'day and didn't just hit up Rasputin for a used copy to stunt in the video.

HD of Bearfaced ft. G-Dirty - Don't Like Me
(From YouTube; 2015)



Don't Like Me was one of last year's two great Bay songs to bear an accidental Carl Craig influence. This shit sounded like a Landcruising-era remix of an old Messy Marv track, whilst Sage The Gemini's Bad Girls sounded like Oscillator being played on a malfunctioning turntable. Here's hoping 2015 is the year some Oakland producers inadvertently channel My Machines and Bug In The Bass Bin.

Puttin' the TM into TMZ

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"If your lawyer paid and you made out in court
And your baby momma took you off you child support
You at the club like *GLORY TO THE LORD, GLORY TO THE LORD*"


King Los ft. R Kelly - Glory To The Lord
(From t'internet; 2015)


King Los zings an ill-subliminal in the direction of Special Ed and his Kickstarter fuckery which closed 2 days ago 96 grand short of the number he was looking to raise to finally pay his outstanding CSA debts fund a new album? You know we've got love for he who once had It Made here at The Martorialist, we're just on some Tim Westwood meets Wendy Williams type shit today - glory to VladTV, glory to Lord Jamar!

Glory To The Lord is the Rap & Bullshit throwback banger B-Boy could have been if only it'd had R Kelly sanging "I got all the homies with me, that's the homie ghost" in the place of A$AP Ferg sounding like the poor man's Puffy on the Dolly My Baby remix. Glory to the R&B SPM, fuck the Trap Lord! When that nonce Kelz says "shorty is the shit, no manure/booty so big, Hallelujah" it's like he's been possessed by the homie ghost of Castor Troy.


Random stuff

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Frankie Tha Lucky Dog is the only person who could ever make me laugh during a conversation about Lil' Phat's death. David Drake's article on/interview with Frankie got more quotables than Great Adventures. Read it here.

The pros of being British: you can enjoy Tyga's new Freaky Tales redux song with Boosie guilt free because Kylie Jenner would be 100% legal here.

The cons of being old: you try listening to Future's 56 Nights mixtape but the sheer barrage of Ironside theme samples just makes you go and play Positive K's Step Up Front and Above The Law's Murder Rap instead.

Told y'all Troy Ave was gonna fill the void left by Hell Rell. Would still rather listen to I Know Why You Mad over 90% of New York rap made during the last 3 years, mind.

Seeing the Ego Trip site posting mixes by a white 43 year old AZN fetishist who refers to records as vinyls and has a spreadsheet of how many ethnic friends he has like Wicked22 makes me think that Ted Bawno might be real after all.

Every day this week I've checked VladTV to see if there's a Lord Jamar interview about Rachel Dolezal and every day I've been disappointed.

Rap songs that aren't on YouTube but really should be #10

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Back in 2007 a compilation of mysterious origin appeared claiming to be a gaggle of lost rap songs by various golden-era big hitters, all recorded in 1988 at some Manhattan studio which had been looted during the Tompkins Square Park riots and then closed down shortly thereafter. Top Shelf 8/8/88's backstory turned out to be a complete crock of hokum cooked up by Fab Five Freddy & Benjy Grinberg AKA the CEO of Wiz Khalifa's record label, but you had to applaud the pair of them for dreaming up such an audacious piece of backpacker-bait and then having the cojones to make it happen.

The compilation itself was a surprisingly good mixture of tracks recorded specifically as if they were from 1988 like Grand Puba's Let's Go and Black Sneep's I'm The One, and previously unreleased cuts obtained by possibly underhanded methods like Melle Mel & Grandmaster Caz's The Battle Is On and Special Ed's This Mic. Smooth B's I Want My Money sounds like it was recorded a good few years prior to his 2005 single Game Over, so whilst the song definitely doesn't date back to 1988 you can still pretend it's some mythical double A side to Greg Nice's 1994 minor-classic party anthem Set It Off.

Smooth B - I Want My Money Back
(From Top Shelf 8/8/88 compilation; 2007)


Rap songs that aren't on YouTube but really should be #11

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It wasn't until adding the html to yesterday's Rap Songs That Aren't On YouTube post about I Want My Money by Smooth B that I realised the Black Sheep track from Top Shelf 8/8/88 ain't on the 'Tube either. Dres probably recorded I'm The One with the intention that it should sound like Black Sheep's equivalent of Think, but you'll have way more fun with the song if you pretend it's an outtake from A Wolf In Sheep's Clothing which lost its place in the album's official track list at the last minute to make way for U Mean I'm Not.

Black Sheep - I'm The One
(From Top Shelf 8/8/88 compilation; 2007)


R.I.P The Cut

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Can't believe Charlie Sloth is favouring Coke Boy Money over Off The Rip as his current French 'n' Chinx track of choice when the latter is the much better song and the one that's been adopted by New York radio playlists. Apt that Off The Rip should be a Bloody Money homage since Chinx was very much the Capone to French's NORE on their songs together.

French Montana ft. Chinx & NORE - Off The Rip
(From Casino Life 2 mixtape; 2015)


Related note: this 1995 freestyle by Capone, Noreaga & Tragedy is so good it almost sounds like an unreleased The War Report track.

Savile Life 2

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"Mama Mia, I wanna put somethin' in Aaliyah
Sippin' Sangria and smokin' on Maria"


SPM ft. Baby Beesh - Oh My My
(From Time Is Money album; 2000)



Oh boy @ that "Guess I been lookin' for love in all the wrong places" line!

This is the post where I become the rap equivalent of one of those Gary Glitter apologists who are like "yo, but he's still got tunes tho!" Probably booked myself a one way trip to Hades by posting two SPM tracks this year, but at least I'll get to spend the rest of eternity listening to Happy Perez-produced rap songs by #problematic artists whilst all y'all have to grit your teeth through the good lord givin' endless rewinds to Doug's All The Way To Heaven. Don't worry about me, like the IRL Ken Kaniff (© RMH) SPM told his family after the judge sentenced him to 45 years in the bing - "it'll be okay!"

It was only fair that Baby Beesh got his own animated tattoo in the video and SPM didn't because double B kinda murdered Miguel Mars Bar on his own shit here: "I need a hearing aid or some handicapped parkin'/damn, Baby Beesh you so damn retarded!"
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